Flowers for mamas
Since Mother’s Day is Sunday, today I thought I’d highlight a few flowers that can be helpful for mamas – particularly those with little ones.
Before I dive in, I feel it’s important to always stress that all 38 flowers can be used by mamas (or anyone for that matter).
However, there are a few specific flowers that as a mama I reach for time and again that I’d like to highlight and offer to any others moms who might be having similar struggles to mine.
Meltdowns – yours and theirs
As the mama of a threenager (that’s a three year old acting like a teenager), I know what it’s like to feel as if you’re at the end of your rope and fear you might lose your temper with your child. My husband and I take a very peaceful approach to parenting and discipline, but there are days when my nerves are so frayed that I’m just one more “No mama!” away from screaming my head off.
This is where Cherry Plum comes in handy. It helps when you feel as if you’re going to lose control by easing the mounting tension and restoring a calm and rational mind. It can be helpful in scenarios like the one I mentioned above, or for any time you fear you might do something you’ll later regret.
And as a special bonus, it is also very helpful for toddler/threenager meltdowns and tantrums.
I recommend filling a tiny spray bottle with spring water and adding two drops of Cherry Plum. The next time either you or your child are nearing the meltdown zone, spritz the air around you both, take a nice deep breath (or two) and invite the calm.
Should you not be able to get to the Cherry Plum in time, however, and meltdown mania ensues, this is the perfect time for Rescue Remedy – the pre-blended mix of five flowers that Dr. Bach recommended for crisis and emergency situations.
And in my book, a mama meltdown or a toddler tantrum most certainly constitute a crisis.
You can buy Rescue Remedy at most health food stores and at CVS (welcome to the mainstream Dr. Bach!). It comes in many forms such as a tincture, gum, pastilles and spray bottle. I choose the spray bottle which, like above, I spritz around my daughter and I when either of us is falling apart.
Pity party of one
Often the reason I feel like I’m going to lose it on my child is because there are days when I just don’t feel loved or appreciated. When my little one tells me she likes daddy better than me, or when I buy her something new and she bluntly tells me she wanted something else, I admit, my feelings get hurt.
Although my head knows that these behaviors are totally developmentally appropriate, my heart does not get that message. Sometimes that leads to a feeling of wanting to lash out (hello, Cherry Plum). Other times, if I don’t catch myself quickly, the tiny hurt can turn into a pity party of one and in no time my internal monologue becomes a rambling mess of thoughts like, “Nobody loves me”, “Nobody appreciates me”, and the ever popular, “After all I do for her this is the thanks I get?”
Time for some Chicory.
Chicory is one of a handful of flowers no one likes to admit they need. Dr. Bach indicated that it was for those in a state of possessiveness, self-love or self-pity.
But let’s face it, as moms of children of any age, there are times we feel as if no one notices or cares about our efforts and we feel justified attending that pity party for one.
Justified or not, wallowing in self pity doesn’t feel good for very long and it does nothing to improve the relationships with the very people we feel aren’t appreciating us.
So, instead of wallowing, or even worse, passive aggressively trying to make your child feel guilty, try some Chicory and perhaps you’ll begin to see that sometimes kids say and do mean things, but deep down they really do love you.
Let the sunshine in
In my short time as a mama I have woken up on way too many days feeling depressed. There’s no reason why, really. Generally, life is fine. But for some reason it feels as if a dark cloud is hanging overhead.
The more mamas I meet and get to know, the more common this gloomy depression seems to be. I can’t speak to why so many of us feel this way, but I do know there’s a flower to help part the clouds and let the sun shine back in.
Depressed Mama, meet the Bach flower Mustard.
As you may have guessed Mustard is for feelings of depression, gloominess or melancholy. The key here is that the depression descends for seemingly no reason and often disappears quickly, with little reason as well. (If your depression has a reason behind it, or is chronic, other flowers may be indicated.)
But in the case of a random gloomy day or two, Mustard will help to, as Dr. Bach put it, “dispel gloom and bring joy into life.”
Sounds like heaven to me.
Although I could write a book on all the ways Bach flowers can be useful for mamas (and maybe someday I will), these few flowers are the ones that I personally reach for often, and I encourage anyone feeling similarly, to give them a try.
I wish every mother out there a beautiful, stress free, pity free, depression free Mother’s Day!